Another milestones..

Assalammualaikum..

For the last couple of days, we've arrived to another 2 milestones for our small family.. 

The recent one, yang paling ramai tahu i suppose, is my beloved little captain's second birthday. Alhamdulillah..he is two. Healthily and cleverly growing day by day. Agak sedih jugak sebab impian nak throw a birthday party for him this year tak tercapai..Kehidupana diri sendiri and family pun tak terurus buat masa ni..lagi kan pulak nak plan/organize a birthday..Kem salam jer lah jawabnye.. Kalau ada rezeki we might held a party jugak kot for him..belated pun boleh lah, janji ada.. Harap dimurahkan rezeki untuk itu..

Bagi pihak Rafique, i thanked all yang sudi like and comment wishing happy birthday for him dekat facebook..may he grows healthily and be a good muslim and son. In sha Allah..

This is the 2 years old boy of mine with his wan..^__^

two days before Rafique's second birthday was our 3rd Anniversary..alhamdulillah..syukur..

moga keharmonian hidup berumah tangga ini akan kekal ke akhir hayat kami.. semoga Allah terus kukuhkan ikatan yang kami bina ini..

Update blog asal sempat..kalau nak tunggu cerita panjang lebar, maka entah bila berkesempatan..hehe..

peace.

progress

PROGRESS OF ABAH

sudah berumur 49 tahun pada selasa lepas..alhamdulillah..walaupun takde hadiah bulan ni, insyaallah beli hadiah untuk abah bila balik kampung nanti. i already have something in mind to buy for him as a a birthday gift. tak mahal but i believe it means a lot to him. nanti dah beli i share apekah benda itu. tungguuu...

abah dah banyak berubah dari abah yang saya kenal sejak dari kecik dulu..abah i sekarang bukan lagi abah yang garang. abah saya bukan lagi abah yang sekali jeling, tak yah bukak mulut pun sume anak lari mencicit pergi mandi and semayang maghrib..abah sekarang dah jadi tok bah yang melayan Rafique cakap kat telepon sampai setengah jam walaupun Rafique cuma sebut  "tak, no, bah" dok ulang tu je pun..tapi abah layan jugak. kengkadang i naik konfius. betul ke abah aku ni boleh buat gitu. hihihi...

dan bila i call dia cakap happy birthday, dia tanya Rafique tak nak nyanyi untuk tok bah ke?? aiyoooo..bukan nak cakap thanks sebab anak wish. asyek2 cucu dia je...nyampah i tauuu..

PROGRESS OF RAFIQUE

he turns 1 year 10 months yesterday..another 2 months to go to breastfeed him..kalau ikut perasaan malas, rasa macam nak wean off dah sekarang ni..sebab Rafique ni dia ada satu perangai suka mimilk tapi sebenarnya tak mimilk pun...haaaa..konpius kan?? camni camni..dia mintak nak mimilk, tp bila i bukak, dia minum jap, pastu dia tgk tv atau main tapi bila i baru nak tutup, dia mintak balik..and so on...haaa..gitu lah kekdahnya..

tapi i rasa dia sebenarnya nak suruh i duduk n tengok dia main saje..taknak bagi ibu dia gi basuh baju, jemur baju , kemas etc..kesian lahh anak ni..bukan ibu tak nak duduk je main ngan Rafique sepanjang masa, nak memang nak, but duty calls lah sayang..tambah lagi dengan hubby yang keje more than 12 hours daily  sekarang ni, semua household tasks i handle sorang-sorang..tak kan nak harapkan encik hubby yang balik keje pukul 1-2 pagi tu jugak jemur baju n mengemas..sian lah dia..ye dok?? aiyaaa...

in term of his vocab progress, sangat memberangsangkan lately..he captures a lot of word. sometimes i got surprised! like this morning, masuk je kete, dia cakap " bu, dai (kedai) ter (water)" amboiiiii..sejak bila pandai ajak gi kedai ni anak?? i rasa ni pasal atuk dia selalu bawak gi kedai belikan air untuk dia lah ni.. and somehow he manage to put words as sentence..3-4 words each sentence. good enough. happy to see his development. 

yang i rasa paling comel about Rafique these days adalah dia akan mengaku ape je yang dia buat..dia sepahkan makanan, dia ngaku. dia buang sampah merata, dia ngaku. kalau kita tanya sape poo poo smelly pun, dia cakap "fiqfiq" that's how he pronounce himself. ^_^ kalau jumpa bird he'll say " hi bird, nem (name) fiqfiq" (hi bird my name is fiqfiq) sambil jari telunjuk kat dada dia..

our latest trick to keep him calm while waiting for food kalau makan kat luar adalah....bring his colouring book and colour pencil.

berjaya laa buat masa ni..sampai ayah ngan ibu pun kena coloring dengan dia..and few books to read in case lama sangat nak tunggu foods..budak2 kan cepat boring..jadi kena ada varieties lah..maka gitu lah kekdahnya..nak kena punggah books dia ke hulu ke hilir..

PROGRESS OF MY STUDY

alhamdulillah dah dapat black and white on the grant funding. worth 140000 USD a year and its going to be a 2 years project. hope everything will go smoothly. semalam dah berskype dengan my SV and co-SV. in this research, dia ada macam terbalik sket. my SV is not the Principal Investigator for this research but my co-SV..ni semua management issues laaa...under this research project, ada 2 orang doctoral students..me and another doctoral candidates of John Hopkins itself..so, we'll be working hand in hand for this project. for her, my co-SV is her SV while my SV is co-SV. haaa..gitulahh cerita dia. 

it's a large amount given to us. i am nervous about it. risau lah kan..orang bagi kepercayaan kat kita handle duit half a million to be spent, they must be expecting something very big..and at the same time i feel very honoured since ada 22 research proposal applying for the grants, my reaserch project adalah 1 out of 3 yang berjaya. kembang bermangkuk-mangkuk rasanya..hehe..alhamdulillah..syukur Allah permudahkan jalan i..

bulan Ramadhan dan Syawal ni will be a hectic months for me. there's a lot of thing to do, a lot of reading to be made since we are in the planning stage. kan biasa kita dengar, "if you fail to plan, you plan to fail" warhhhh..takuutttt.. please pray for me dear family and friends..

masa discussion with them last night, i feel like resigning from work hari ni jugak because i can imagine the whole load on my backbone now. moga2 i berjaya lah mengharungi challenge ini..lucky enough i have sparring partner lah kan..at least kalau kena grill oleh my SVs to, i takdelah sorang2, kami berdua..hehehe..

so, kawan2..please please please..pray for me..moga Allah S.W.T mudahkan jalan i..semoga Allah S.W.T tabahkan hati i dan hubby i..i know this is not going to be a challenge to myself only, but to the three of us. hubby and rafique pun kena tolong ibu baca journals jugak yer lepas ni..haha..

enough till now. thanks for bare with me until the end of this long entry.

selamat berpuasa dan selamat berbahagia.

bye.

one flaw in women

By the time the Lord made woman,

He was into his sixth day of working overtime.

An angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so much time on this one?"

And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on her?

She has to be completely washable, but not plastic,

have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable

and able to run on diet coke and leftovers,

have a lap that can hold four children at one time,

have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart

-and she will do everything with only two hands."

The angel was astounded at the requirements.

"Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model?

That's too much work for one day.Wait until tomorrow to finish."

But I won't," the Lord protested.

"I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart.

She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hours a day."

The angel moved closer and touched the woman.

"But you have made her so soft, Lord."

"She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough.

You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."

"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.

The Lord replied,

"Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate."

The angel then noticed something, and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek.

"Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model. 

I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."

"That's not a leak," the Lord corrected,

"that's a tear!"

"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.

The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride."

The angel was impressed.

"You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything!

Woman is truly amazing."

And she is!

Women have strengths that amaze men. They bear hardships and they carry burdens,

but they hold happiness, love and joy.

They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry.

They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.

They fight for what they believe in. They stand up to injustice.

They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.

They go without so their family can have.

They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.

They love unconditionally.

They cry when their children excel

and cheer when their friends get awards.

They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.

Their hearts break when a friend dies.

They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.

They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.

They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.

The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.

They bring joy, hope and love. They have compassion and ideals.

They give moral support to their family and friends.

Women have vital things to say and everything to give.

However, If There Is One Flaw In Women,

It Is That They Forget Their Worth.

ada orang ajak mama kawen

short trip pulang ke kampung sempat juga ber"pillow talk" dengan mama..i memang macam ni..kalau balik kampung, usually i and Rafique akan tidur kat bilik mama..hubby tido sensorang..hehehe..kasik chance lah kan..so the pillow talk session begin with...

"ada orang ajak mama kawen"

by the way, my parents had divorced since i was in form 5..my dad already have his own family while my mom was alone since then. banyak kali jugak mama cakap ada orang ajak dia kawen before this..tapi sehingga hari ini, tinggal cakap2 saje..and this time yang mengejutkan i, bukan sorang tau..3 orang tuuuu...selling like hot cakes pulak mama i neh...zaman i single mingle dulu pun tak pernah sampai 3-4 orang ngorat i sekaligus..ini sudah lebih...hahaha.. ;)

one of them is mat salleh u know...OMG... mama i dah nak pegi duduk London lah pulak.. shian lah kita Rafique...jauh dah nak jumpa nenek lepas ni.. ;P manalah mama i jumpa ngan mat salleh ni..i wonder..mat salleh ni selalu datang ke Malaysia untuk kerja..most of the time they contact with each other through skype and whatsapp!!hambek ko..kelass mak kau.. i terkejut nok.. my sister pun penah cakap dengan mat salleh tuh..even my mom pernah cakap dengan mak kepada mamat salleh itu..hoiii...i wonder how serious their relationship is...hurm..hurm... i pun tak tanya banyak pasal mat salleh ni..i just ingatkan mama to be extra careful..yer lah kan..kita pun selalu dengar cerita pasal keldai dadah etc tu.. i am worried..tambah pulak siap ajak my mom pergi duduk London, tak payah kerja, jaga dia je... ;( am i being skeptical or what??

so, next step is need to stalk my mom's FB..wakakaka...mama, be careful yer... bila i cakap dengan hubby, my hubby pun cakap "you kena investigate orang tu" kalau dia datang KL, we might need to meet him..we'll see how..

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the second candidate is a man, with a wife yang sakit since the past 10 years..i kenal this man since few years back..and i can smell 'something' on him..ye lah..walaupun i ni tak lah banyak pengalaman sangat, tapi of course we can see kalau seorang lelaki tu suka kat seorang perempuan tu..right?? contohnya, dia (yang takde hubungan ape2 ngan kitorg) tiba2 bagi duit RM50 kat Rafique. bukannya time raya pun.. i sangat tak setuju lah kalau yang ni..he's someone husband. luckily mama pun tak suka..and she's trying to avoid him. he insist to meet my atuk..konon nak mintak permission lah..dah tu kalau mama tak suka, nak permission kejadah lagi???dah orang cakap tak nak, lagi nak paksa..tak suka betul lahh!!!

i've discussed with my adik..kalau nampak macam over2 pulak mamat ni, memang wa kasik sound jer..mentang2 bini kau dah sakit, kau nak carik lain..kalau mak aku sakit nanti, kau cari lain jugak lah!!!memang nak kena laser ni..

*       *       *      *        *        *        *      *        *      *

and the 3rd candidate is a widower with 4 children..anak dia pun dah baya2 kitorang..semua dah besar..his wife meninggal dunia 3 years ago..i quite like this man.. even my abah pun kenal orang ni.. pendek kata out of the 3,i rasa yang ni paling OK lah..takdelah i nak kena pergi London pulak untuk jumpa mama kan..and the materialistic side of me said he's established enough untuk pastikan mama hidup senang in future.. ;D tapi mama macam berat hati jugak nak terima..sebab mama cakap, kalau dia kawen, dia mesti lah kena pindah duduk rumah orang tu..so, kalau my adik2 balik from hostel, of course dorang tak selesa untuk balik ke rumah orang tu..especially if they need to share room sebab masing2 pun dah biasa ada bilik sendiri..so, my mom was afraid that she'll lost her children.. kalau difikirkan secara logik pun, memang lah my adik2 akan lagi suka balik rumah abah if this thing happen. even myself yang balik sekali sekala ni pun, mesti tak betah duduk rumah "orang lain". kan??

kesian pulak kat mama bila i fikir pasal ni..i was quite selfish before..tak nak bagi mama kawen lagi..because we don't want to share our mama with others. and i believe mama pun selesa macam sekarang when she's free to do whatever she wants to. tak yah pikir nak jaga makan pakai laki.. tak yah nak pikir pasal in-laws..tapi sampai bila?? sekarang, she's still strong enough that she can work to earn for herself..i ni topup pun sikit2 jer..bukan nya i mampu nak bagi duit RM 2-3 ribu sebulan kat mama so that dia boleh duduk rumah goyang kaki jer..tak kan lah bila mama dah tua nanti dia nak duduk sorang2?

me n mama in blue..=) 2 years back when i was pregnant to Rafique..

for this, i let her to decide on her own..i doakan yang terbaik untuk mama..i faham it's a big conflict in her..between a life partner and her children..she sacrifice her happiness to make sure non of her children get hurts.

to have a partner, a husband adalah naluri semua wanita..lebih2 lagi bila dah berusia..kalau mama ada teman, at least she don't need to wait for me or my sister to come back for pillow talk session..at least there's someone who can take care of her..i know its not easy to go through 10 years without a man called husband..at this moment of time, i just want her to be happy and enjoy her life. i really hope she'll get someone who can take care of her so she dont need to earn a living by herself..i sendiri selalu rasa down bila tengok my MIL and FIL who are still loving couple sampai sekarang..deep inside i hope mama pun akan dapat seseorang yang boleh berkongsi suka duka..

mama..

for what your decision is..

for whom you choose,

think about yourself..

love is sacrifice but please don't sacrifice yourself..

we are big enough to think..

we are big enough to understand..

love you so much...

A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.  ~Tenneva Jordan

naik pangkat???

orang lain gembira dapat naik pangkat, i pulak rasa macam horror..!!!

i got this so-called-GOOD-news last week.officially..kalau nak kira tak official, dah lama dah jugak..tp still in denial, sebab tak ready dan kalau boleh tak nak..by the way, just ask any lecturers if they want to be Program Manager/ Program Coordinator, mesti ramai yang geleng kepala..walaupun ada allowance, tapi beban yang dipikul adalah menjadi 3 kali ganda (sedangkan nilai dalam pay slip tak jadi 3 kali ganda pun)..dan ini juga adalah menjawab kenapa i jarangggg update blog recently.

konon sibuk. (ek?)

walaupun half-heartedly menerima tanggungjawab ini, i took it positively setelah consult encik suami. at least after graduated with phD later (insyaallah) i have the extra point to write in my CV. well yes, only for this one year. before i can hold back all the previlege to be a-full-time-student cum housewife instead of junior lecturer cum program manager.ohhh..tak sabarnyaa...february 2013, cepat tiba ye...

sekarang, i masih dalam proses adapting to new life. lecturer cum program manager cum blogger cum student cum mommy cum wifey. sounds tamak eh?? hope i'll manage to cope with this things soon..

bye..

cheap way to have an enjoyable weekend : KLCC park

its a blessed weekend..a plan-less weekend..bukan senang nak dapat weekend macam ni these days..ada jer planned activity..so what's so great about plan-less weekend is we woke up without a need to rush and get ready for A, B, C, bla bla bla....so on and so forth..just let the time go with the flow..=)

part of the plan-less weekend, we went to KLCC yesterday morning..bangun pagi, gosok gigi, cuci muka dan mandi, terus pergi KLCC.hihi..saje nak bawak rafique mandi pool..KLCC is actually just 15 minutes from our house on SUNDAY morning!!kalau weekdays, toksah harap lahh yer..lagipun kitorang keluar pagi2 lagi..around 8.30 camtu..mana ada mall bukak at that time kan..

so, here we gooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!

sampai park awal sangat..pool only open at 10am yer..jadi layan lah playground dulu sampai lebam!!

budak ni banyak berlagak tau sekarang..x nak bagi orang pegang dia dah nak turun slide tu..dia sendiri push himself..see the happy faces??pastu sebok nak naik slide yg orang besar naik punyer..yg kecik2 tak mau..bila dah sampai bawah, dia bukan nak naik balik ikut tangga, dia nak panjat ikut slide tu jugakk..macam lahh terer sangat..=P

making friends..=) rafique ni memang one friendly baby..he easily make friends..tak kira laa mana kitorang pergi..especially with bigger kids..memang age conflict dia ni..nak main ngan orang besar jer..a day before, kitorang gi makan kat Sate Kajang, dia dok sibuk join ada 3 orang adik beradik aged 2-5 years old main kejar2..org tak kejar dia pun xpe lahh, asalkan dia boleh join berlari sama2..gambar kat atas ni, dia tibe2 jer gi "cakkk" kat budak tu..tengok la muka blur budak tu..mesti dia heran nape lahh orang ni tetibe jer nak "cakk"???

chase the birdss!!!

swing time..

pants off sebab lepas main slide, rafique dah poo poo..masuk jer washroom, dia dah bukak paip sendiri..maka sodakallah lah seluar..dah lah ibu lupa bawak seluar extra..baju bleh plak sampai 3-4 helai..hihi..anyway, cute CD save the situation!!imagining kalau rafique pakai pampers jer berlari kat taman tu, buruk benar rupanya..huhu..

now, pool time!!!!!!!!!

spot the tiny little tot???

i got new friend..=)

another new friend..i think Rafique looks macho in this pic..haha

yess!!he makes new friends..as usual elder friends..and these 2 kiddos really enjoy entertaining Rafique..nak ajar rafique swim strokes segala..i tukang tengok dari jauh nih naik sakit jantung..haha..

in conclusion, WE ARE HAVING FUN!! definitely will go again next time..its a cheap way to spend the quality time..just bayar RM 2.50 parking fee for 2 hours. provided u all pergi pagi2 lah..sebab mall tak bukak lagi..and another tips is parking kat masjid KLCC.sebab parking tu is on the other way, tak payah masuk mall..dan agak jauh jugak kalau nak berjalan ke suria KLCC..jadi possibility untuk menjadikannya cheap way to spend the weekend adalah tinggi compared to parking dalam KLCC..yer laa..kalau dah parking kat mall, dah tentulah lepas main kat park, strolling in the mall pulak..pastu harus lah mak pulak nak bergembira shopping pulak lepas anak dah gembira kat park kannn??? yang tak gembira hanyalah suami.kihkihkih..

KLCC park punye maintenance memang bagus lah..broken facilities were barricade so that kids don't use them..and my hubby said dorang memang cuci the pool daily..twice daily actually..petang lepas pool tutup, dorang akan dry out the pool..then pagi, before it is open to public at 10am, pun ada workers yang cuci pool tu..jadi, i would suggest if u all nak bawak anak pergi KLCC pool tu, pegi pagi2 where the cleanliness memang tip top lah compared to waktu petang setelah seharian pelbagai bangsa dan usia kanak2 dah berendam dalam tu..=)

because tomorrow..

tomorrow will be a very exciting day!!

because tomorrow i'll go n pick up something which is very special from Kak Kiwi's oven which hopefully will make him happy on the day after tomorrow..

and tomorrow also will be a big day to one of my besties, my lovely kak mimi n his very-soon-to-be-hubby, wandy..paling gembira for them coz after all the ups and downs, happy and teary moments along these 5 years, they finally will be pronounced as man and wife..i nearly cried writing it here!! #emoterlebih

dan sangat seronok sebab dapat jumpa besties masa kat upm dulu..geng2 sama menari n theatre, perform together, training sampai pukul 5pagi, pastu bila dah habes show or competition pergi berhoyeah2 beramai2..miss those momentos..

another part which hopefully will be interesting too is the reading part.yeehhhhaaa!!! esok kena start writing my proposal..tak boleh biar idea2 hanya terawang di udara..kalaulah idea tu boleh disedut and by magic written on papers..#how i wish

ok lah..nak balik.bye!!

susah hati vs senang hati..

susah hati sebab hubby demam..

panas sangat badan dia..semalam check 39.4 degree C.

Hari ni hubby tak keje tapi i kena redha jugak tinggal hubby sensorang kat rumah sebab banyak bebanan tugas iaitu 2 set soalan exam yang tak siap2 lagi..aiyooo..

susah hati jugak sebab Nora Elena banyak sangat episod.

keje banyak nak kena buat..nak kena tengok Nora Elena lagi..

susah tuuuuuu..hihii..

moga cepatlah kesukaran2 hidup ni berlalu.Allah bagi dugaan sebab DIA sayangkan kitakan??

* * * * * * * * *

senang hati sebab 14 chapters Industrial Hygiene lecture sudah settle!!

berjaya jugak mengharungi 14 minggu yang sukar ini..lega.tinggal soalan je.

senang hati jugak sebab Rafique tak meragam lagi dah macam last week.

dah tido lena sepanjang malam.tido awal pukul 8, bangun lewat kul 7.30 pg.i like it bebeh!!

paling senang hati bila dah bayar downpayment untuk rumah baru.

hujung bulan ni masuk.insyaallah..bye2 rumah 5 tingkat, saya mahu pindah rumah 2 tingkat.

daaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...

wordless wednesday : prince of my heart ;-D

before i was a mom..

Before I was a Mom…

I made and ate hot meals.

I had unstained clothing.

I had quiet conversations on the phone.

Before I was Mom…

I had never been puked on,

Pooped on,

Spat on,

Chewed on,

Peed on,

Or pinched by tiny fingers.

Before I was a Mom…

I had complete control of my mind,

My thoughts.

My body,

And my time.

I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom…

I never held down a screaming child,

So that doctors could do tests,

Or give shots.

I never looked into teary eyes and cried.

I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.

I never sat up late hours at night

Watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom…

I never held a sleeping baby just because.

I didn’t want to put it down.

I never felt my heart break into a million pieces.

When I couldn’t stop the hurt.

I never knew that I could love someone so much.

I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom…

I didn’t know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.

I didn’t know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.

I didn’t know that bond between a mother and her child.

I didn’t know that something so small

Could make me feel so important.

Before I was a Mom…

I had never risen in the middle of the night.

Every 10 minutes to make sure all was alright.

I had never known the warmth,

The joy,

The love,

The heartache,

The wonderment,

Or the satisfaction of being a Mom

thanks Rafique Zaquan for all the special feelings you bring me into..

just love to be your mom..

love u baby..

al-fatihah...

tengah hari tadi balik rumah kejap, amek Rafique sebab his babysitter kena balik kampung urgent >> ayah akak tu meninggal..takziah to Kak Ani and her family..

masa dia call i suruh amek Rafique tu, dia kata ayah dia tenat..tapi masa i sampai umah dia, dah bercucuran air mata, n terus peluk i..saying that her father had passed away..sungguh, i will feel awkward in such situation..tak tahu nak respond ape..sebab i ni memang spesies tak reti nak pujuk or cool off orang2..(tapi kalau i merajuk, orang tak pujuk tau pulak nak saket hati!!) tapi kesian sangat laa coz she and her siblings planned nak balik kampung Jumaat ni..just another 2 days kan..mesti terkilan sangat tak dapat jumpa for the last time..

and i definitely understand the situation...

coz i pun tak dapat tengok langsung wajah my younger brother yang meninggal on August 2006..rupanya dah 5 tahun he passed away..how time flies..bila ingat pasal Asyraf (his name) i felt soooooo stupid for not being aware of his long WEIRD message...

one fine night he texted me..masa tu i kat UPM, 2nd year of my degree..

"Abg Ngah (dia laa tu) kan sebenarnya sayang sangat kat family kita semua..kalau esok awak call mama, cakap kat mama abg ngah mintak maaf sangat2 sebab selalu susahkan hati mama..susahkan hati abah..nanti awak cakap kat mama tau..cakap kat semua orang dalam family kita, saya sayang sangat semua orang..saya janji lepas ni tak susahkan hati sape2 dah.."

n my reply??

"bagus laa kalau tak nak susahkan hati semua orang..tapi...ni buang tebiat ey??call laa mama sendiri.." << read this in as irritating intonation as you can!!

kejam kan ada kakak camni???

that message was sent just one day before he met with the accident!!!

dan yang paling menyakitkan adalah dia meninggal on Sunday night..dan kitorang hanya tahu tentang tu on Tuesday morning!!2 hari ambil masa untuk call the victim's family???AND I AM THE FIRST PERSON TO KNOW THE NEWS AS THE POLICE READ THE MESSAGE THAT HE TEXTED ME!!!!!!

alasan polis lambat bagitau???IC dia alamat umah lama kitorang..telefon dia takde bateri, tak boleh on!!!like WTF??? ko charge baterry for the whole day ke hari Isnin tu baru dapat on handphone dia???

and because he have internal bleeding which did not stop (one of his tulang rusuk broken, tercucuk jantung and his heart puncture), dia dah siap2 dimandikan kat hospital and kafankan..we all tak boleh bukak and tengok (even his face) sebab takut kalau2 ada darah, nanti kena mandikan lagi...=(

for god sake i really do miss him..walaupun kitorang ni macam anjing ngan kucing..dari kecik memang suka sangat bertekak, bergaduh..sebab kitorang berdua je yang umur rapat2..2 years gap..dengan adik yang no3, gap 7 tahun..

Al-fatihah to arwah Asyraf Azinuddin bin Zakaria..

semoga roh beliau dicucuri rahmat dan di tempatkan dikalangan orang beriman..

amin..

Iftar Ramadhan week 1

Assalamualaikum...

i ni kunun2 jer lah sebelum start Ramadhan tu bercita2 nak masak everyday for lovely family..tapi hasilnyer, hampehss..sehingga semalam 8 Ramadhan, baru 2 hari jer yang i berjaya masak..

dimulakan dengan 1st Ramadhan we went to my brother-in-law's house in Bukit Indah, Ampang for iftar..just the four of us plus 2 lil heroes..pergi rumah dorang lepas balik keje, konfem2 laa i sampai untuk berbuka jer..takdenye nak sempat masak ke hape..huhu..

second day, berjaya masak kat rumah..menunya : ayam masak sweet sour & udang goreng tomyam tah pape..resepi belasah jer sebab nak buat butterprawn sebenarnya..tapi lupa nak beli breadcrumbs..hihi..yang penting hubbyku makan hasil air tangan isteri..rite??=)

3rd Ramadhan balik rumah MIL..emergency sebenarnya..sbb hubby sakit pinggang..nak balik urut ngan papa..tak kan laa lepas berbuka baru nak balik ke Meru sana tu kan??so, terus balik dan berbuka kat sana sajo..selamatlah lemak2 dibadan i daripada digunakan untuk melakukan aktiviti memasak pada hari itu..

4th Ramadhan gatai pulak en.hubby nak ajak pergi bukak puasa kat luar..off we went to Alamanda..ingat JM Bariani ada buffet, tp takde upenyer..dan pilihan sungguh tak tepat ok hari tu..JM Bariani, Alamanda punyer performance pada bulan puasa is macam hampeh!!just imagine, we reserved, ordered and made payment at 5.30pm..pastu gi laa round Alamanda sementara tunggu nak berbuka..kul 7.20pm, we all pergi sana, air belum sampai..makanan pulak hanya sampai selepas habes 2 slice cake Secret Recipe!!aroung 7.50pm camtu..GRRRRRR!!

tu kira ok lagi drpada orang yang tunggu nak order, tapi sebenarnya dia dah tak amek order masa tu..fheww!!if i was in their shoes, ada kot pergi report kat Manager dia ari tu..

sabar..sabar..seb baik bulan puasa..

5th Ramadhan is the 2nd day i berjaya masak..simple2 jer pun menu nya..sotong sambal ngan ayam goreng madu..jadi laa kan??makan berdua jer pun..asal ada makanan sudahhh!!yang bestnya, walau masak simple tapi hubby tetap makan bertambah2..i like lahh hubbyy!!

6th Ramadhan iftar beramai2 at MIL's house..SIL masak gak ikan pari bakar bawak balik umah MIL..i bawak balik kuih dari bazar ramadhan sudah..=) dasar menantu pemalas, gitu laa..

7th Ramadhan we went for iftar with my lovely girlfriends, Kak Mimi n Kak Dayah also Rizal..berbuka kat Kenny Rogers, KLCC..convention centre yer kawan2..kalau u all cari Kenny Rogers kat KLCC itself, memang tak de!!saje gi convention centre..orang tak ramai sangat..surau pun besar..bersih..selesa..=)

pasangan yang bakal kawen end of this year..uuuwww..cant waitt!! ^U^

pasangan sudah kawen..

pasangan tak leh kawen.. @_@

us..with the foods.

.

and little prince..muka kunun pasrah..padahal dok tengah melasak..snap pic tengok kamera jap, sambung melasak lagi..

since hubby tak puas hati tak dapat makan Chilli's on Sunday tu, semalam 8th Ramadhan we went to Chilli's pulak!!ngeee...me tak yah masak, memang on jer lah!!

menu of the day!! Rafique masak ashamm..;-D ANYONE???

My honey crispy chispotle chicken..yumsy!!all time favourite..

ni free menu for Rafique..=) my milk booster perhaps.

.

owhhh..just love this two molats!!muahhhhh...

hari ni nak gi pasar..nak masak..korang doakan laah i berjaya meneruskan misi tu..harap tak kecundang lagi..

daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa....

practicing for the second baby..

wallah tajuk takley blah..saje nak bikin tersebar khabar angin konon i dah pregnant for our second baby..ececehh..macam lah ada orang kesah..ko ingat ko artis??

honestly, i'm not yet ready for that..simple maths..sekarang Rafique 10 bulan..let's say i'm preggy now, he'll be a brother at the age of 1 year 7 months old ++..wehhh..keciknyerr laa nak dipanggil abang..cam kesian jer i rasa..mesti jadik cam tak cukup kasih sayang..

cuba tengok kejelesan abang itu dalam pic kat bawah ni ha..

mula2 tengok dari jauh jer...

ibu, jangan laa dokong baby tu...dokong Rafique laaa.. - kata Rafique..

yang dalam picture tu, Damia Zahraa anak dara si AJ-the-mommy..i pergi tengok baby dia last Friday..dek kerana jeles tu, hampir laa jugak nak kena penampar Rafique..shian baby Damia..

dah 10 bulan i tak pegang baby, rasa macam kekok pulak pegang baby yang kecik comey ni..baby Rafique tuh dah tak terlarat nak dokong pulak..

tapi i rasa, mesti ribut kot umah kalau i ada 2 orang anak camni..kang baby nanges..kejap Rafique nak susu..jap lagi sorang berak, sorang nak makan..huiihhh..pening2..cemane laa gaya agaknya orang yang beranak tiap2 tahun tu ek??ada 18 kaki tangan ker??hihihihi..

meh tengok hubby i pulak practice ada anak 2 orang..

let's pretend Rafique dapat adik lelaki..yang besar tu Rafique, Rafique sekarang ni adalah adik Rafique..konon2nyer la...hammmbekkk dua2 nak duduk atas riba..kalau yang kecik 10kg, yang besar 15kg..tak yah exercise angkat dumbell dah..2 orang ni pun cukup laaa..ibu??memang tak terlarat laa nak riba dua2 camneh..patah peha i!!

time single dulu berat 47kg..dapat anak sorang berat sekarang 43kg..kalau anak 2 orang, tinggal 39kg..kalau 3 orang??kalau 4 orang??memang terbang ditiup angin agaknyer..

siblings rivalry eh??

yang si bulat sorang lagik tu anak buah hubby..Danish Harraz, 2 years 2 months old..

these 2 little teletubbies always make my days..

and unforgettable my mr hubby yang tak berapa nak teletubbies>> he's one of the best thing happen in my life..

tapi kan..tapi kan..seronok kan tengok orang yang anak berderet tu??boleh pakai baju sama..bila dah besar dorang boleh jadi kawan..borak pasal study, boypren..bukan macam i, adik jauh sangat umur..takde geng..sekarang i dah beranak, dorang baru sekolah menengah..tak best..tak best.. tak best..

anyhow, i'm still not yet ready..mungkin 2 tahun lagi..mungkin 3 tahun lagi..ikut perancangan mungkin lepas i dah settel phD..tapi kalau Allah memang nak bagi rezeki itu, kami tak tolak..insyaallah akan terima dengan hati terbuka..

~kita hanya merancang, DIA jugak yang akan menentukan~

WALLAHUALAM

u all pulak cam mane??dah ready for next??;-p

wondering???

sejak ada Rafique, perhatian i rasanya dah beralih 360 degree to him..

kalau ikut peratusan rasanya 20% jer untuk hubby..

another 80% is Rafique's..

masak memang jarangggggg sekali..

harapkan weekdays memang tak sempat..

balik keje laju2 kemas apa yang patut sebelum amek Rafique..

Rafique pulak memang kaki gayut..kalau dah tertido pun,

bila dia rasa ibu takde kat sebelah (takde tempat untuk ber'gayut') terus sedar..

bila dia lelap kejap2 tu, laju2 lagi i kemas2 apa yang patut..

gitu laa tiap2 hari..

hubby memang tak kesah i tak masak..bukan setakat tak kesah, siap tak bagi lagi..

dia kan konon nak diet..pastu pulak dia kesian kat i kot kelam kabut ngan Rafique..

tapiiiii...rasa cam sian pulak kat hubby...

most of the weekends memang we all akan ada macam2 plan..

paling2 tak pun, balik rumah MIL..

kalau dah balik umah MIL, mesti laa MIL yang masak..

takde maknanya i masak..

bukan malas, tapi segan..

kat umah MIL ada FIL and BIL and SIL gak..

segan laa kalau dorang masak masakan i yang ala kadar compared to MIL yang memang expert masak tu kan???

what if kalau dorang makan macam ala-ala kadar je??

i pulak yang kecik ati nanti..

so, baik tak yah!!HAHAHAHHA..

jauh dah merepek, back to citer hubby..

selain dari tak masak, i pun tak iron baju hubby..

mr hubby i gi keje pakai t-shirt jer..

kekadang tu, kalau rasa bersalah menebal, i iron gak kemeja untuk hubby pakai gi keje..

tapi hubby tak bagi.sebab dia kata, dia naik motor, pakai jaket, kedut gak!!

tak iron kan baju, tak masak, jadi ape jer laa yang i buat untuk hubby???

buatkan air jer la..=)

i ingat bulan puasa nanti i nak usaha gak masak..

sediakan makanan untuk orang berpuasa kan dapat pahala..

untuk suami sendiri pulak tuh..

u all doakan lah i berjaya atur masa untuk itu..

kalau ada tips, tolong share pleasee..

p/s : hubby i melancarkan misi nak berhenti smoking mulai hari ni..doakan dia berjaya yer..=)

daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...

selamat ulang bulan yang ke 10 sayang..

oh my oh my...in just another 2 months, you'll turn 1..

macam tak percaya jer ibu dah berjaya memBESARkan seorang manusia..

kalau 10 bulan yang dulu Rafique seberat 2.96kg, sekarang dah 10.8kg!!

kalau 10 bulan yang dulu Rafique hanya sepanjang 48 cm, sekarang dah separuh dari ketinggian ibu kamu yang tak berapa nak tinggi ni..

kalau 10 bulan yang dulu Rafique cuma reti tido, minum susu n nanges jer, sekarang tidak lagi!!!

there's sooooo many things u've achieved..

Rafique dah pandai panjat kerusi..

panjat katil is still in progress..sebab katil ibu tinggi sangat..

Rafique pun dah pandai merangkak cari ibu kat kitchen atau bilik air sambil panggil "mamamamaamama"

belasah lah sayang..mama pun mama lahhh...

kalau ibu kat dalam toilet, Rafique tunggu laa depan pintu toilet tu sambil ketuk2 pintu..

ibu nak membuang pun tak tenang..=D

Part makan sangat mencabar..sebab Rafique nak makan apa yang orang lain makan..paling suka laa dia kalau kita suap apa kite makan..nak jadi besar, kena laa tumbuh gigi cepat2 yer sayang...

gigi maintain tak de lagi..tapi gusi banyak tajam woooo!!

sakit bila dia gigit..kekadang tu rasa cam nak putus nipple ibu ni wehh..

kalau ikutkan geram, mahu jer sumbat botol terus..

tapi bila dia dah tido,

tengok muka dia yang sayu time tido tu, terus tak jadi nak pikir pasal stop breastfeeding him..NO NO NO..pastu terus rasa cam bersalah to have that kind of feelings..tah papetah ibu ni kan Rafique??insyaallah..ibu akan terus kuat hati untuk terus breastfeed Rafique selama yang mungkin..tapi Rafique kena janji don't bite ibu lagi tau!!kalau bite, ibu picit hidung Rafique nanti..

Rafique dah pandai berperang ngan ibu time nak pakai baju or change CD...

sangat pandai gelak..macam faham jer laa orang cakap ape ngan dia..as his name "Rafique" he is a real good accompany..kalau stress lepas balik keje, stress tunggu hubby balik lewat, borak2 ngan Rafique terus jadi happy..=)

Kejayaan yang paling besar untuk bulan ke 10 ni, u know how to express your anger..

tapi ibu belum sempat lagi nak take video on that..later laa ibu amek..

tapi walaupun anak ibu punyer laa genggam tangan, ketap gusi bergetar2 pun, u still looks cute baby..and ibu memang tak ley nak marah..gelak lagi ade la..hihihi..

paling suka kalau masuk bilik air..

nak cuci poo poo pun dia ingat nak mandi..

tak dapat mandi (main air) mula laa nak marah..

pastu ibu n ayah need to be extra cautious during shower time now, sebab Rafique dah pandai nak stand dalam bath tub!!it's dangerous laa..

last few days, dapat pulak skill baru..

bukan setakat mengemas yang kat depan mata jer, drawer pun Rafique dah tahu cam mane nak bukak..and dashboard too!!!muka bangga jer bila dia berjaya bukak..

makin banyak laa tempat dia boleh mengemas pasneh...

rasanya ada lagi kot pencapaian baru..tapi ibu tak ingat dah...nanti2 kalau ada idea lagi, ibu tulis lagi..

happy 10 months young birthday baby!!!

the two of you means the whole world to me..

love love love you soooooo much..

muahhhhss!!